(no subject)

[voicesofspirits]

This week has been very difficult. It's been a lot to take in. Only now am I feeling like I can somewhat write about it here.
... it's just hard to believe that I'll probably never get to see any of them again.
But things needed to be fixed. They needed to be balanced. If it hadn't, the result of it would of been a lot worse... and not just for me.
I know they'll be fine... and a part of me is there with them.

...I guess at least... I don't have to worry about such an uncertain future anymore...

----------------------------

Event

*Ruka can be found sitting on a bench in the park. She is looking down at a card in her hand, completely lost in thought. Occasionally, she looks up and looks at her arm where her signer mark used to be with a forlorn look on her face.
It looks like she needs some company.*

Comments

[cuterthancute]

::So, Ruka, you see someone land from the air, wearing gauntlets and a demonic helmet and chest armor with a long red braided ponytail.::

... Ruka? Is everything alright?

::... What the.::

[voicesofspirits]

*Ruka looks up at the person who just LANDED FROM THE AIR in silent surprise. It seems like she might not quite recognize you with your outfit on.
But it seems to of taken her mind briefly off what was bothering her.*

Er...

[cuterthancute]

...

???

::They tilt their head approaching you.::

Is something wrong? You look upset.

[voicesofspirits]

*Ruka looks puzzled, though she seems to somewhat recognize the voice. After thinking on it for a bit, it seems to click with her on who this might be.*

...Shinoko...? Is that you under there...?

[cuterthancute]

... Under...?

::...:: Oh. Sorry.

::Takes the helmet off, as it vanishes into thin air.::

Sorry. But is everything alright, you look miserable.

[voicesofspirits]

*Ruka sighs and looks back at the card she's holding.*

... things aren't really alright, but there's nothing that can really be done.

[cuterthancute]

Care to talk about it? Or would you like to do or talk about something else. I don't like seeing you sad, it feels like something is wrong with the world when you're miserable.

[voicesofspirits]

I can talk about it.

It... sort of involves you anyway. So it's for the best that you know.

[cuterthancute]

...

::The rest of her armor vanishes as she sits next to you in nice clothes.::

[voicesofspirits]

*Ruka waits for Shinoko to sit down before she begins.*

... I was visited by the Crimson Dragon a few days ago.
I found out about what happened the night my brother and friends disappeared.
I found out that when it went to transport us back to our original timeline, it's power accidentally split me up into two halves because I was so strongly undecided on where I really wanted to be.
I wanted to be with them... but I also wanted to stay here.
But this, along with me being here in a timeline I shouldn't be in, caused an imbalance that not only affected me and the other half of me... but it also backlashed onto you.

The Crimson Dragon came to me to give me two choices to fix the balance;
Re-join with the other half of me, but retain no memories of the last few years here, or stay here but give up my status as a signer.
Making no choice would of resulted in all three of us being erased.

*Considering she's still there and talking to you right now, it's very obvious what choice she made.*

[cuterthancute]

...

Man, fuck that giant star god or whatever he is.

... so why'd you choose us?

[Event]

[seaandsky]

*oh he definitely saw your post. And he got understandably very worried about you.

In fact he was just on his way to SAI to see if you were there, when he ended up spotting you at the park instead, as he goes up to you, the obvious concern all over his expression*

Ruka...?

[Journal]

[memoryistime]

... hey, uh. I know we haven't talked much, but.

Did something happen?

[voicesofspirits]

*Ruka lets out a fairly heavy breath.*

It was a very hurried decision I had to make but... in the end, my brother and my friends have me with them there. If I had joined back with that half, I would of essentially lost everything I'd experienced in the last two or so years here. The friends I made in that time I wouldn't remember... the confidence I've gained I wouldn't have and... I wouldn't of been able to continue with the career I've been putting so much effort into.
Even though I really would like to be with my brother and friends again, I knew they were fine and that they hadn't spent their time worrying about me.
Since there's a part of me there with them and they're none the wiser about everything... it felt like I should stay here.

[cuterthancute]

...

::... thinks for a second and gives a big friendly hug.::

Re: [Event]

[voicesofspirits]

*Ruka looks up from the card she's holding and spots Shinji, looking at him with a bit of surprise on her face.*

Shinji.

*She tries to put on a smile for him, but it's obvious that it's rather forced.*

Re: [Event]

[seaandsky]

*... he sighs a little, at least relieved that you're uh. Not in any terrible state-- it's a good thing you're out here at least and not like, locked up at home or crying, but he knows that smile is forced.*

... I saw your post. What happened?

Re: [Journal]

[voicesofspirits]

It's a little complicated but...
... I was visited by the Crimson Dragon a few days ago and I had to make a choice to correct an imbalance that was affecting me, Shinoko... and another half of me that ended up with my friends back in the timeline I came from.

Long story short... I'm not a signer anymore.

Re: [Journal]

[memoryistime]

Oh, uh. Geeze, that...

My first gut feeling is that the Crimson Dragon was pretty cruel for giving you a choice like that, but... I guess at least you had the chance to make that choice, right? Though that doesn't make it any less hard, I'd figure.

... You ended up getting split, though? I know you're from another time or something, but...

[voicesofspirits]

*Ruka returns the hug, holding onto Shinoko tightly. Seems like this is something she really needed.*

Re: [Event]

[voicesofspirits]

I... *She breaks off momentarily, looking away slightly.*
...I was visited by the Crimson Dragon a few days ago. I found out about what happened the night my brother and friends disappeared.
As it turns out, I was never really left behind. Not on purpose anyway. It seems that my indecisiveness on where I really belonged caused the Crimson Dragon's power to split me apart when he went to transport us all back to our rightful timeline.
But... it caused an imbalance and it came to me to fix that imbalance, otherwise, myself, the part of me that's with my brother and friends and Shinoko would of all been erased.

In the end, the only choices I could make to right the balance was to either re-join back with my other self back in my original timeline, but have no memory of the last few years here... or stay here and give up my signer powers.

Re: [Journal]

[voicesofspirits]

Yes. It seems because I was so strongly indecisive about where I really belonged, when the Crimson Dragon went to transport us all back, it's power accidentally split me apart.

[kattobingore]

Hey, did something happen...?

[cuterthancute]

... ::Keeps hugging.::

So how have your theses been going?

[voicesofspirits]

*Ruka takes a moment, before she pulls back to respond.*

They've been going really well! I've been looking into some interesting stuff lately but... it's a lot to go into. Maybe I could show it to you sometime while at work.

*At the very least, there seems to be a small smile on her face now.*